Wednesday, February 16, 2011

How do you forgive??

How do you forgive and move on? The bible says too, so that's the only reason you need to forgive, right? I am dealing with trying to remember how to love and forgive everyday lately; how does your "bff" spread so many lies and take so many friends, that you've done so much for away from you, how do you forgive her for it? Well, the bitterness is eating me up and I realize more now than before, that she really doesn't know Jesus and she needs salvation. Anyone who has to try and put others down to make themselves feel better or who can sit across a table from you and spread lies through text while you buy her ungrateful "follower" a dinner for his b-day is not a true friend. Anyone who worships themselves more than Jesus or who doesn't worship Jesus period at this point, but yet tells you they're praying for you and that you get back to your "good girl roots" is not a friend or a christian in my opinion.

The Bible always preaches about doing unto others, well that's the story of my life. I've always put my needs behind boyfriends, best friends, family, strangers, why? Because that's me and I have a big heart. What happens when I do that....I get kicked, walked all over, punched, knocked down, lied about, rumors are started, lies are spread......So what do I do, I cry and think why me for 2 weeks then learn, they are not a true friend because they don't know how to be a try friend. A true friend loves at all times, not lies, not cheats, not tries to make themselves look better b/c they are so angry and bitter.

Well, it's time to move forward and put her and them all out of my life, if they are stupid enough to be a "follower" of hers and believe her lies, then I don't need them period. If she is angry enough to be bitter, then let her have her lies and bitterness, what will they get her at the end of the day? A very, very, very lonely life.

So how do I forgive is my question? I forgive again, because God commands us too, but that doesn't mean that everyday when I look at my life, the missing ppl in it because she lied and spread rumors, it doesn't make that easier. But what can I do, they're not worth the time and energy. I took food to a friend when he had surgery and what does he do, believes her lies, why because she's a good talker. If I've learned one thing recently, it's that manipulators and liars are good at lying straight to your face and showing no emotion, that's what a liar does. On the other hand, someone who wants nothing but everyone to get along, gets upset, cries, etc. That's me in a nut shell, but you know what I'm learning they're not worth my tears and even if someone doesn't like me, I'm going to church whether you don't want me there or not, that makes you look bad in God's eyes NOT ME!!!

Please pray for me as I have lost too much recently to really feel the truth in anything. I want my best friend back, but until she stops telling me and everyone else that we need help and seeks help for herself, I don't need her and she does not deserve me as a friend. I pray for her salvation and that she will look inward and see that she needs Jesus more than anything and that people realize the kinda lies she's told and stop listening to her garbage.

1 comment:

  1. Meredith, I have been thinking of you lately. I know it can be hard. My best friend has changed over the past year and it is hard for me to see how different she is now. Thinking of you